Cant Turn Back Now
by Hermione Sandwhich
Summary: Hermione cant decided to live in the past forget it all or simply move forward


Disclaimer: I don't own and of the harry potter world I just like to play around with the characters.

Hermione looked at her self in the mirror her eyes had sunken and dark circles surrounded them. Where she once had bright pink cheeks they were now a sickly shade of gray, her sharp bones were protruding through her skin. Her hands rested on her slightly swollen stomach the guilt setting in worsening her ever deepening depression. It had been a little over three months since the final battle... since he had died. Tears began to well up in her eyes once again she couldn't help it now. Her ever growing depression had begun to take hold of her. She didn't want to go on with out him, yet she had to. It wasn't fair she could never escape the memories she had to deal with seeing him every day.

She knew George was not him and never could be, and she didn't want him to be either. Every quick glance she thought it was really him that this had all just been some kind of tasteless prank. But it wasn't. George had less freckles along the bridge of his nose and his eyes did not have the green tint she could stare at all day. Fred was gone and he was never going to come back.

She bent in half crying and fell on the floor landing with her back against the bath tub her head cradled between her hands and he knees and the tears flowed freely. The realization that he would not be there for them was overwhelming. Hermione leaned back and let her hands rest on her stomach. She had told know one about this yet and wanted to keep it that way. Of course George had found out any way.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Two Months Ago ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hermione stood in her bed room, well Fred's room. She brushed her hair staring back at her reflection in the mirror, she was planning on visiting Minerva Mcgonagall in hopes that she would be able to return to Hogwarts and finish her last year. She didn't need to, helping to defeat Voldemort gave her credentials for any job she wanted, but she didn't know what she wanted. It had been a month since the final battle, and Hermione had moved in with George. She remembered Fred's funeral, and dropped the brush from her hair.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Day After The Final Battle~*~*~*~*~*~**~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The family watched as they buried Fred's body he was laid next to Remus and Tonks and all the others who had died that fateful night. The grounds at Hogwarts provided a beautiful resting place for those who had given their lives to save the world. Hermione stood next to George the two trying their best to be strong and hold back tears. George reached for Hermione's hand, needing something to hold onto, she let him lace his fingers with hers and then he felt something inside her palm. Discreetly he looked down between their hands and found flipped upside down was a diamond ring on her finger. Embarrassed George quickly dropped her hand and leaned in next to her.

"When did Ron give you that?" He whispered only loud enough for her to hear.

"He didn't." She responded. George was stunned as she walked away a red rose in her hand. Bringing up the end of the line of those paying their respects to the dead, George followed her as they went down the line of the friends they had lost. Hermione stopped at the last grave, Fred's grave, she started crying, everything that she had held in was let out slowly she bent down and placed the rose on Fred's grave, and George could barley make out her sobs a whispered "i will always love you." it dawned on him that Ron didn't give her the ring Fred did and all this time he never knew. His heart broke for Hermione he wasn't the only one who had lost his other half. Quickly he caught Hermione in his arms letting her cry into his chest the two gripped each other tightly and George began to cry as well. When everyone else had disappeared George pulled back holding Hermione's face in his hands.

"I never knew." She sniffed trying to compose her self.

"We were planning on telling everyone after this was all over I didn't want anyone to use him to get to me." The tears she had managed to hold back threatened to break through once more. George stared at this poor distraught girl... no woman in front of him. She still wore the same ripped burnt and dirty clothing she had on the night before, pieces of her hair were matted and burnt together and her face was dirty and bloodied and her eyes red and swollen from tears.

"Come home with me. What kind of a man would I be if I didn't take care of my brothers girl." she hesitated a little uneasy by the suggestion but then she realized where else could she go her parents didn't know she existed and were happily in Australia, and poor molly had a house full as it was. "I cant stay in that apartment alone Mione." He needed her help too and Hermione could see that. She slowly nodded, they could hopefully help each other.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Two Months Ago~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Hermione continued to stare back at her reflection she missed him so much. As always when she thought of Fred a wave of nausea washed over but this time it didn't go away no this time it was real. Quickly she an to the bathroom swiftly emptying the contents of her stomach. George rushed in after hearing the door slam open. Silently he knelt down next to her and gathered her hair behind her neck. Once finished Hermione leaned back on her heels and George let go of her hair.

"Thanks George." She caught her breath and started to smooth her hair down.

"Mione this has been going on a few days." She nodded.

"But I feel fine after." The two sat in silence, both seeming to be deep in thought.

"Are you pregnant?" Hermione didn't say anything but George could tell she was thinking the same thing. Silently Hermione leaned her head on his shoulder and her wrapped his arms around her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Present Day~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

She had never gone back to Hogwarts, she was still trying to figure things out. She didn't want to bring a child into this world with out a father, but she couldn't bare to forget this happened she had a part of Fred and she didn't want to just cast that off. Staring at her reflection like she had been for these past few months she realized what she needed to do . Hermione walked out of the bathroom and made her way to the kitchen to make up something for dinner. George walked through the door coming up from the shop from the day.

"Mum came in again today." Hermione sighed molly had been badgering them to visit for weeks but neither one of them wanted to interact with the family.

"And?"

"And she asked us to come over for dinner."

"Of course."

"And when I said no she asked if you were even really here and thought you had run away." she let out a small laugh. "at one point she tried to push her way up here to see you." Hermione tensed at the thought of having to confront Molly Weasley. "I told her you were sleeping and not to disturb you."

"Well it was the truth it seems that all I do now." She was disgusted with her self for her laziness it was nothing like she had once been. George placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

"I'll get us dinner go sit down."

The two sat down in silence eating their dinner. The two barely talked neither had any idea what to say to the other and both were still hurting. About ten minuets into their silent dinner George felt something wet and sticky hit his face. He screamed surprised by the assault and lifted his hand to remove what ever stuck to his cheek. As he wiped it off he noticed it was mashed potatoes the same ones they were eating. He looked up and saw Hermione holding the offended spoon that had flung the object a small smile on her lips.

"You're in for it now Mione." George jumped up from his chair and Hermione took off. George and Hermione raced through the house both their wands out chasing one another around furniture weaving in and out of rooms. Finally the two collapsed in a heap on the floor both out of breath and covered in their dinner neither one could stop laughing.

"I haven't laughed like that in a while." Hermione breathily let out.

"Me either." George laughed. "You look ridiculous."

"So do you." They both laughed a little more and slowly the awkward quiet began to settle in and with out any thought George leaned in and kissed her, as quickly as it happened they both pulled away shocked. George had no idea what came over him he mentally cursed himself thinking instantly that she would leave and he would be alone, and he needed her as much as he needed him.

"Mione I'm so sorry I don't know what happened I didn't mean-"

"George its fine." Hermione looked down she had enjoyed the kiss surprisingly and that made her guilty why she couldn't tell. Did she betray Fred? Was she using George? She couldn't tell and the fact that George was so embarrassed and quick to dismiss it really hurt. The two sat on the floor both covered in the remnants of their dinner. "I've decided to keep it." George was taken aback for a minuet and had to think about what she was talking about.

"The baby?" She nodded George wasn't even aware that she had thought of different options truthfully her current condition never crossed his mind now it struck him she had a part of Fred and she was strong but she couldn't do this alone. "Are you sure?" Hermione stared at the floor slightly awkward thinking George was going to kick her out and she would have no where to go. "OK then we can do this." She looked up tears in her eyes and saw his sad smile he just offered to help her, he still wanted her here, she fell into his arms holding him tight.

"Thank you." She was crying she had never dreamed of asking him to help her, this meant so much to her. After a couple minuets they pulled back and Hermione wiped the tears from her face. The two stared at each other not really sure where to go after this since it had been an odd night.

"What should we do now?" George asked, Hermione thought for a second looking around at all the food covering the apartment.

"Let's go to the burrow we still need to actually eat. I also wont be able to keep this quiet much longer." George stood up waving his wand and cleaning up the apartment.

"If that's what you want, hurry up we don't want the food to be cold."

The two aparated outside the Burrow with a pop, Hermione smoothed down the dress she was wearing most of the men wouldn't notice but she was pretty sure Molly would be able to tell that she was expecting. George threw his arm around her shoulder.

"You still want to do this?" Hermione took a deep breath nerves setting in.

"Yeah let's get this over with." The two walked up to the crooked house and knocked on the worn door. Within seconds Molly answered the door and immediately screamed with joy ushering the two inside she hugged her son and then turned to Hermione hugging her tight. After she held her at arms length no doubt noticing her sickly state then her gazed fixed on Hermione's stomach. Hermione looked at her with pleading eyes and Molly pursed her lips together and continued to usher the two in to join the rest of the Weasley family for dinner. Despite her nerves Hermione felt so much better after seeing everyone it had some kind of calming effect on her and George both. As the dinner wound down out of know where Hermione got a burst of courage.

"I'm pregnant." Within seconds after her out burst Ron dropped his plate the pieces shattering along the floor and he jumped at George.

"What's wrong with you you bloody git." Ron yelled as the two rolled along the floor Bill and Charlie jumped up and restrained both their brothers and Molly was screaming at both her sons behavior. Hermione let her face fall into her open hand shaking her head at the spectacle' she had caused in Molly's kitchen.

"It's Fred's not George's." Ron and George were still going at it. "It's Fred's not George's." She yelled again louder. Finally every one got it and quieted down staring at her. "We never told anyone because I didn't want him to be used by any Death Eaters." She pulled the ring he gave her out of her hand bag and slid it on her finger and flashed it to the family. Molly squealed and ran over to Hermione and enveloped her in a hug tears in her eyes.

"Don't worry dear it will all be fine." Hermione smiled at the older woman relived that she had finally told everyone and at least has something stable going for her right now. "Now who wants pie." Molly ran out of the room to grab desert.

"I'm sorry about your nose." Hermione took out her wand and pointed it and George's swollen bleeding nose "Episky." George groaned as his nose slid back into place.

"You didn't break it ickle ronnykins did." They looked back over at Ron who was concentrating only on the food on his plate not daring to look up at anyone else. "Don't worry he will come off it eventually thank you for fixing my nose, does it make me dashing again." She smiled.

"Of course it does." George slid his hand onto her thigh and she placed her hand reassuringly on his as Molly came back with enough food to feed the entire Order of the Phoenix.

Authors note: I originally meant for this to be a one shot and then about half way it took a different turn I'm not sure now if I will leave it as a one shot or continue I hope you all enjoyed it and would like to hear your opinions

Love HermioneSanwhich


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